Say there, friend...

 Are you "normal"? 

Brian Wilson explains.

Are you “normal”? An “average” American? Do you live in “fly over country”? Do you answer to Bud? Bubba? Joe Sixpack? Do you know what “F150” stands for? Do you have a red neck?

If you answered “uh-huh” to any of the preceding 11 questions, this article is for you. The rest of you can go back to watching CNN, listening to PBS and reading the New York Times, and other erudite media.

For the rest of you Deplorable, Extreme MAGA Republicans, Heterosexuals and non-binary citizens, you’re likely aware the Mainstream Media, Academia and every elected, appointed or casual bureaucrat at any level of any government agency are of the firm belief you’re ‘stooped’, ‘iggerant’ and barely capable of justifying a minimum wage. If that thought hasn’t crossed your mind, welcome to reality.

Remarkably, the same elitists who look down their noses at you (think Chuck Schumer) and the well-coiffed, sartorially resplendent on the Evening News are the same geniuses who know exactly what you want, don’t want, need, don’t need, are angry, confused, or upset about. They know all this because you don’t and you need to be told. Once you’ve been informed what your problem is, those Delphic Oracles in Washington will then explain how their latest legislation scheme is going to solve all your problems, punish the people who piss you off, provide everything you lack and fix everything that’s broken. Of course, if it isn’t broken, they will be sure to break it first so they can claim to fix it and earn more of your undying gratitude.

If all that sounds out of line, over the top, or just doesn’t make any sense, is because it doesn’t. But being just a normal, average, fly-over country resident with an F150 and a red neck who’s married to Mrs. Sixpack, you’re insufficiently informed and intellectually hobbled to understand. Hells bells! You probably watch FOX and think Tucker Carlson
is God!

Fortunately, according to your Elected Representatives, you’ve retained enough functioning gray matter to know to vote for the same genius who thinks you’re a moron. It’s only a keen sense for the obvious or some miracle of evolution that you can successfully dress yourself each day before meandering off to do whatever it is that puts food on the table, gas in your pick-up and contributes mightily to your Senator’s lifetime 6-figure pension.

It’s reasonable to conclude, you are among those Tommy Jefferson referred to in the Declaration as “prudent” and ‘more disposed to suffer’ than run off half-cocked to start a revolution. On the other hand, TJ was also referring to you when he jotted down the part about being ‘reduced under absolute despotism’, it is your ‘right and duty to throw off such government’ and come up with something better.

Checking the status of the country – including the fly-over part – it’s not difficult to see what an absolute disaster these brainiacs have made of things. Trying to find an area of life at any level in these United States they and all their laws and regulations haven’t FUBAR’d is a Herculean task. That Washington, DC mirrors the mythical Aegean Stables did not happen by chance but by the same wanton neglect. Those fabled stables hadn’t been cleaned in 30 years. By that standard, Washington is long overdue. The good news is it won’t take diverting the Potomac to clean things up, but rather the prompt and relentless actions of people united in purpose to fulfill Jefferson’s prescient conclusion.

It’s left up to the latter-day Hercules, a composite of all the Deplorable Six-Packs in their red hats driving the family in their fossil-fueled pick-‘em-up trucks with the flag decals. But it’s also the clear thinking, common sense motivated individuals regardless of residence, vehicle or head covering who know from their hearts, guts and brains something is wrong and needs to be fixed.

Pronto.